I don’t know how many times I’ve heard it. Time and time again being told ” not right now,” “Its not your time,” “Keep waiting,” “try again next month.” Its getting tiring, old, and hopeless. Each month you look forward to different news. To something more positive, but the same result, the same outcome. You try all types of ways to encourage yourself and pray earnestly that this month will be different. Its a tight rope that you feel like your walking on, between hope-full and hope lost. Each symptom you look up, hoping its an early sign of pregnancy. A backache, nausea, reflux. Hoping this time is it. But, then when you least expect it, Aunt Flo appears. It feels like a funeral each month. A mourning of a dream lost, of a desire lost, of a yearning lost. The flush…..sigh…..how many more months can I endure the same let down. There’s gotta be a better way. …and I know there is. It means I need to let go of my prayer that I’ve held on to for years. Some of us months, some of us a decade. It doesn’t matter how long you’ve waited. Not right now…is not what you want said. Even if you say it to yourself. “Right now ” is always what you hope for the next month.
Ways to handle the waiting:
- Plan ahead- Figure out the date of you period and plan something special, self care, a dinner date
- During the moment-journal, take a walk, bake, draw, express how you feel, pray, surround yourself with the things that bring you joy.
- After – Acknowledge getting through the tough time successfully, acknowledge your strengths, appreciate your resilience.
Angel Carried Grief Counseling Practice 